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The trials and tribulations of a middle-aged PACS consultant,
father, and garage sale junkie as he engages in his
never-ending search for sanity in an insane world.


Sunday, August 22, 2010

Life, Raw


Whenever I get down or hear others complain about how their life sucks I go back and read the ongoing saga of Josh and Lisa Hunter. Josh and Lisa’s little girl Ava has an insidious form of cancer known as Glioblastoma multiforme or GBM for short. Josh’s blogsite can be found here: http://joshuajoelhunter.blogspot.com/

Life was wonderful for Josh and Lisa until their daughter Ava started having bad headaches at a family reunion in June. Lisa’s second sense kicked in and they took her to the local hospital, did a CT scan and found a tumor the size of a lemon growing in her tiny six year old brain. The surgeon excised the tumor the same day yet this disease from Hades has come back with more of a vengeance than ever just a few months hence. The doctors have given her less than 3 months to live yet Josh and Lisa hold onto the hope that the Great Healer can work miracles the doctors simply can’t.

If prayer alone worked Ava would be up and running as so many people across the country and even the world are praying for her that it boggles the mind. I can’t discount prayer- it has gotten me through some of life’s biggest troubles- but as Josh has said, he needs time to work his plan. Will he get it? That is up to God. His father, Pastor Joel Hunter, of Longwood-Florida based Northland, A Church Distributed, I got to know while I ran the sports ministry there in from 1995 until 2001. He is one of President Obama’s handful of close spiritual advisors, and is a wonderful man even if I don’t necessarily agree with his current political views (although he was actually a die hard Mike Huckabee fan even though Huckabee never made it out of the starting gate) .

Behind the door in my office is a quote from a sermon Pastor Joel made on March 12, 2000. It helps motivate me every day and is simple in its message-“Get off the couch- Work WITH God….” Josh and Lisa are doing all they can to work with God and just need Ava to get well enough to get her to New Jersey to see a specialist who has had some success with GBM in children. When the success rates for survival beyond 12 months are in the low single digit you grab at any straw you can. I’m sure that is where Josh and Lisa are. What strikes me the most though is the strength they both have and raw honesty that Josh has in his blog site. It is amazing.

Couples relationships either strengthen or weaken when faced with adverse situations. Thankfully very few people have to deal with situations like this with their own child. Of those who do I would venture to say that in 99% of the situations it divides the couple. I was faced with similar situation early on in my marriage and while far from life-threatening it served as a catalyst to magnify other problems we had that under normal circumstances would probably have been surmountable. But all things happen for a reason so….that is why I am no longer married. This situation with Ava seems to have strengthened not only Josh and Lisa as a couple but their faith and commitment in God as well. I know that I and almost everyone I know has said that we would be screaming at God right now asking Him how He could do such a thing to such an innocent child let alone to parents who have dedicated their lives to serving Him at an early age (even though that’s pretty hard not to do when you are a PK or Preachers Kid as they are affectionately know). God also should note their grandfather has dedicated the past 40+ years of his life to leading others to the Lord. While I would be saying “Hey God, are you paying attention here?” Josh and Lisa instead seem to be accepting of Psalm 46:10 “Be still and know that I am God.” I’m sure they have screamed out in private- they had to have - but in public their resiliency is incredible. Joshs’s postings are so aching raw and from the heart that they have brought me to tears more than once, and when I think about the possible negative outcome…well I just don’t want to think about it…Yet Josh is seemingly accepting of God’s infinite plan. Read on..

I read the tumor reports tonight. It's big again. It's time that God step in and take it away. I have prayed it a million times today. I know God can do it. I only question whether or not He will. His plans are not always our plan, but I know enough to want to be a part of His plan, not mine. Ava is His and I have believed it all along. I still believe it. I want her here with us more than anything, but have no idea where God needs her. I can only pray it is here.

These next few months will require more strength and faith than we have, but not more than God will give


I am humbled by this man, someone who is 25 years younger than I yet so much more stable in his faith than I am as well.

Several years ago, when my kids weren’t much older than Ava, I did work with St. Jude Children’s Hospital in Memphis, TN. I had never seen so many bald headed kids in one place in my life. I saw one child whose parents looked beyond distraught and asked the doctor what the deal was (this was in the pre-HIPAA days when you could actually talk about such things without fear of being slapped with a $250K fine). He said that the son was not going to make it beyond the week and they had finally accepted that reality. Huh? How do you accept that reality? I look at this child with his trusting eyes and weak smile and just wanted to switch positions with him right here and then. I know the parents felt the same way. This child has so much to live for…I asked the doc how he dealt with death day in and day out. He looked at me, smiled and said “More walk out of here than don’t and those who don’t we learn from to help others.” It’s a great philosophy but being a parent living it? I’m not sure how I actually would deal with it. Frankly I know how I would deal with it- I wouldn’t. I would lose it-completely. While I am weak- Josh and Lisa are oh so strong.

One of the traditions when you enter St. Jude is to rub the nose on the bronze bust of Danny Thomas for good luck. Does it work? Not for all but as the doctor said more walk out of here on their own than don’t….and sometimes that’s all you can ask for .

I wish there was a magic wand I could wave over not just Ava but everyone involved in this situation, but as Josh has accepted that God has a plan even if we don’t know what it is. He is a rock for his family even though I know his pain is there held deep inside. His family, especially his wife Lisa and son Noah, are like no other there with him every step of the way as are his brothers, all the Hunter family members, and their vast network of friends. His God is also like no other. Josh believes when everyone else has given up because he believes in a God that is bigger than all of us. I do too, but I’m one off from Josh. Chris Rice summed up my feelings well in his song called Naive..

How long until You defend Your name and set the record right
And how far will You allow the human race to run and hide
And how much can You tolerate our weaknesses
Before You step into our sky blue and say "That’s quite enough!"

Am I naive to want a remedy for every bitter heart
Can I believe You hold an exclamation point for every question mark
And can I leave the timing of this universe in bigger hands
And may I be so bold to ask You to please hurry?

I hear that a God who’s good would never let the evil run so long
But I say it’s because You’re good You’re giving us more time, yeah
‘Cause I believe that You love to show us mercy
But when will You step into our sky blue
And say "That’s quite enough, and your time is up!"

Am I naive to want a remedy for every bitter heart
Can I believe You hold an exclamation point for every question mark
And can I leave the timing of this universe in bigger hands
And may I be so bold to ask You to please hurry?

Am I naive...
Can I believe...
And can I leave...in bigger hands
And may I be so bold to ask You, to ask You, to ask You
How long?


Josh and Lisa are much more patient than I am….and much more accepting of
God’s master plan. As for me, my thoughts are much more simple and direct

Am I naive...
Can I believe...
And can I leave...in bigger hands
And may I be so bold to ask You, to ask You, to ask You
How long?


Please pray unceasingly for Ava and the entire Hunter family….They need it…and for that matter we all need it…because the life of this child and her family matter…